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Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Lucks of panther and panda (:

Posted by ....:::: Kai Qian =) ::::.... at 10:10 PM 0 comments

heeee (:
found it back :D

#1 there is still hope in the world :D
#2 never never be that careless again
#3 always be positive +)

okay,
I knew i sounded like a child,
but am happy enough now (:
goodnight and sweet dreams =D

Monday, July 30, 2012

Praying hard with hopes ):

Posted by ....:::: Kai Qian =) ::::.... at 2:44 PM 0 comments
Please pop out tmrw, please please please. I'm really praying hard now, i really need you back. I don't mind the money in it is gone, just returned me the others, pleaseeeeeee ): I hope is not what i think, is hard to trace back if it is like what i thought ): pray pray pray, i really pray hard for you to just pop out tmrw ):

I'll try to stay positive, i really will try. please pop out to make me feel that at least there is still hope in this world. okay, it will be found, really it will be found.

with lots of hope.

Thursday, July 26, 2012

Freak (:

Posted by ....:::: Kai Qian =) ::::.... at 11:35 PM 0 comments
I got no choice,
but to spam here (:

I never really said such a thing before,
but that's really how i feel,
when people is trying to talk to the person you are talking to,
and that it is you gone sitting there.

felt like a stupid statue there,
listening to stuff that you are not even interested in,
staring at people like what have I done,
and when people stop talking and turned back to you,
just lost the mood to talk anymore.

the moment when people just ignored you
or saying some rubbish when you are trying to borrow something.
am really fine with that,
if i did that to that person too,
but the problem is that i did not -.-

If you really want to treat me like this,
then don't keep bugging me,
when i am trying to finish my stuff to borrow it to you,
it's not logic and not reasonable at all.

and i wonder when can people stop all the nonsense,
don't try to make yourself like you really want to go for it,
i have been heard so many people saying they wanted to go for it,
and ended up do nothing about it.

If you think it's unlucky not getting it,
just go and apply and not just saying.
when you are scared to got it,
then why said that you wanted to go for it when you did not get it?
that doesn't make sense at all -.-

I knew this doesn't apply to all,
some really wanted to go for it,
they like things like that, bravo for them,
but the others, please stop that,
it really disgusted and annoyed me very much.

ahhhh,
today is totally not a good day,
seriously not a good day.

sorry if this post sounds very harsh,
i just can't get rid of all of those things,
i can't stand that i have to say it out,
really sorry (:

i should make myself stop all the bad emotions,
sleep is better,
nights (:

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Ain't No Perfect (:

Posted by ....:::: Kai Qian =) ::::.... at 9:41 PM 0 comments
I have got no idea what's on your mind,
most of the things you said sound so wrong,
i couldn't agree with you anymore,
ain't going to comment anything,
cause I believe that you will realize your mistakes one day

Nothing is working out,
things have been loitering around my mind for so long,
i felt guilty in whichever option i am going to choose,
cause sometimes i don't think that,
i am qualify to be a real friend.

More like a shadow,
or even things made by polystyrene,
that is how i take myself as a friend of others,
yes, my fault indeed which i don't meant to do so

Life after retiring from prefects is so free,
but yet is like something has gone,
recess with only 2 girls,
with most of the friends already having some place to go
and yet trying to think off what should I do

glad to retire,
but if the rules allow us to stay in class,
it would be much more better,
I will not choose to loiter around,
going into the crowded canteen,
finding a proper place to sit down or even stand.

Am so tired to know what I'm actually doing,
rushing for it like people from the asylum,
and yet is a blur case,
which now i know out and on make a very big difference.

Last report card day,
laughed so much and so hard,
forced to ask parents to make an appointment,
and i wonder what's the point.

travelled so far,
to talk to a person who doesn't even know the student,
am sure enough that my parents know how i did,
how i behave and so on in school
cause they don't even feel like showing up in school

remembered all the report card days for the past few years,
with friends suspected mummy as stewardess d:
mummy took report card without my presence, hehe
daddy complaint to teacher that i don't like to drink water 
and with all the you can get better marks for bm from ezani (:

And yes,
everything happened in school this year will be the last,
the very last in high school life,
and I bet I have been doing nothing for the past few year (:

I don't dare to stand beside her anymore,
saying things that made me so speechless and shocked everytime,
am not saying she's not good,
is just that it's hard to believe.

I'm not that perfect as you bunch of people think,
not even a good girl at home,
I don't do things as well as what you people said,
I ruined things since i was a kid.

Thanks for the praising for my mum,
she's really great but I'm not,
i truly appreciate those comments,
but i really don't deserve them (:

close to 9,
i do better sleep now,
before rubbish are thrown into my mind again.

nights (:

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Turning points (:

Posted by ....:::: Kai Qian =) ::::.... at 8:36 PM 0 comments
*poof*
results is finally out,
am very anticipate to get it,
although i might as well know that,
i am surely going to fail this grade (:

flashing back on the 28th of May,
had a pleasure morning,
nervous afternoon then a wet night (:

She just proved that,
she doesn't care about me,
unlike ms. patricia who is always so concern about my everything,
she just ignored everything,
how great (:

well, 
I don't care about it, isn't it?
or should i ask why should i? (:
I will just get a look at the awesome results i have got on this friday,
and I ain't going to acknowledge you x)

Then, i did not know why is my leg so weird nowadays,
keep getting cramps for the right side :/
and the blood suckers really like my right side too,
i have got so many red dots already -.-
please go away (:

Next thing,
i am now fear to hear the same question,
I really have a hard time to make the decision,
should have stick to my first decision :/

I knew there is no turning back
but to make up my mind as soon as possible,
the angel and demon seems like having lots of fun having the battle,
and there is more and more factors waiting for me to take in account to,
as i said I can't predict and I might have already lost my compass ;/

things have not been going well in class,
never thought of things like that happened again and again
although it doesn't happened on me myself
but am fear to place my important stuffs in classroom now,
cause I'll never know am i the next target 

不再追究,不代表不介意,
只是给你一次机会,
软硬兼施,却未能打动你的良心,
那伤心、焦急的心情,
难道你能不了解吗?
重蹈覆辙只会让你越陷越深,
既然他本人宽宏大量,
你就知足,悔改吧  (:

well,
i have forgotten what i wanted to type d:
so uhm, have a nice week!
tata~ 




Sunday, July 15, 2012

涟漪

Posted by ....:::: Kai Qian =) ::::.... at 11:19 PM 0 comments
纠结,
迷茫,
矛盾,
踌躇

有时候,
真的不知道如何是好,
坐也不是,站也不是,
蹲也不是,躺也不是,
或许浮在空中才对吧 (:

唯一的一次,
把心底话全写进了周记,
真的很混乱,
混乱得好想把自己变成空气,
但,行不通

没有任何事情,
是想象中的那么简单,
因为就算现今小孩子的世界,
也很复杂 (:

抉择,
眼光,
话语,
眼神

不知如何是好,
不喜欢这种感觉,
如果睡醒之后,
一切都化成灰烬,
那该多好 (:

很明确的,
我在自己的世界中,
不断转圈子,
但却转不出,
把自己勒死了

不想再做鸵鸟,
问题始终要面对,
地球不会为任何人停止转动,
倘若最不上他的脚步,
剩下的只有遗憾

不明白为何,
自己可以写出长篇大论的感谢遗憾,
逻辑性确实存在,
但自己却能否做到?

只能对自己说,
challenge accepted
能否问心无愧,
只好看自己 (:

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Words Taken (:

Posted by ....:::: Kai Qian =) ::::.... at 4:13 PM 0 comments
bubulala (:
funny days i have had this week.
heh (;

I still can't stop laughing with today's epic sentence,
it just kept me laughing :D
laughing with rach with the secrets we have,
all the rubbish we talked during bio,
awesome much, heee (:

then, the moment during maths period,
with the 4 of them being chosen for the saturday's event,
which eventually made the whole class laughed :D

back to yesterday's event,
"single single double",
"open open close",
with all the weird weird movements and steps,
heh (:

had fun watching wanli and yuhang having fun dancing there,
saw some students making epic movements,
some even played some childhood games,
and i bet the blood suckers had fun too (:

actually saw nobody on the stage,
indeed i saw many heads,
too short to see anything in front d:

then was super free during gotong-royong,
walked around and find teachers,
played games which is really speechless yet quite fun,
i don know how many "iloveyou" i had said d:

pretending that we were having discussions
when teachers passed by,
ignoring people in charge,
and yes, the typical 5s1 (:
the class which made me had mix feelings (:

I didn't really know why is THOR so trending now
i can see thor everywhere -.-
gor got annoyed to see them appearing d:
so uhm, hope it stops as soon as possible (:

the thing I'm going to wonder is that
when can I get myself back (:
and i do really dislike to have
choices to be made,
cause it just annoys me very much ):

I'd better to stay with storybooks,
dumping my homeworks d:
I can't stand all the suspense in it,
they do really drawn me into it , heee (:

By the way,
Happy belated birthday, daddy (:
me love you <3

nice weather to sleep d:
tata~

Saturday, July 7, 2012

Call Me Maybe (:

Posted by ....:::: Kai Qian =) ::::.... at 3:01 PM 0 comments

heeeee (:
managed to make the 300th post as a happy post :D

7th of July (:
guess what, rachael's birthday !
supposed to surprise you today,
but the plan eventually fail d:

Saw you during form 1,
first thought about you is like
a cheerful girl from the class next door , heh (:

Being classmates since form 2,
sitting nearby me in the class,
I was sitting beside kai song which i seldom talked to d:
ended up kept talking to jia lee who sat just right beside you :D

For me,
KH class pull us nearer especially during all the baking and cooking times :")
kind of know you through kai song and may xian,
i remembered how you people poking each other while playing basketball d:
then i borrowed some carrots from you during the sandwich making thing , heee

Was really glad to see you being allocated into the same class,
cause is like the only a5 people in s1 (:
feeling a little bit weird at first to sit with you,
cause we don't really know each other,
but yet we kind of make it through :D

I actually know quite a lot of k-pop stars from you d:
from all the names being spammed by you on your green green file,
and talking about them frequently,
the most familiar ones are BEAST and doo jun su (:

Have lots of fun sitting with you,
talking some kind of rubbish when we're really bored in class,
scribbling you books with smileys d:
making fun of each other and many more (:

Few more months till graduation,
and I bet i'll missed the moment sitting with you,
just like how i missed sitting with kai song (:
crazy things like the highlighter war is still stucked in my mind,
rflamingo, do bear in mind if you see this d:

Then,
stay sporty like now,
ignore all the comments from them d:
the most important thing is being you yourself,
everyone is special which no one can used to compare with the others (:

Stay cheerful and cute :D
All the best in everything,
you're an awesome friend
and also the best korean sis, heeee (:


Happy Birthday (:
Rachael a.k.a Mrs Kim d:

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The total silent treatment,
made me realize that I was no longer that stubborn,
I might not be the wrong ones,
but being patient and step back once a while,
doesn't harm (:

Nobody feels good after all the rows,
I felt lonely and so do you,
If only both of us could make a step,
then everything will be fine (:

Nothing will go as perfect as we think,
but time heals (:
I'll really treasure all the moments with you,
I can never afford to lose you,
cause I am a child of yours (:

Miracles do happen,
just believe in yourself (:

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Allowance (:

Posted by ....:::: Kai Qian =) ::::.... at 3:51 AM 0 comments

Monday, July 2, 2012

出尘 (:

Posted by ....:::: Kai Qian =) ::::.... at 6:23 PM 0 comments

如果那么简单的一句话你都不明白,
很抱歉,你真的很失败
倘若你连一个简单的指示都做不到,
非常抱歉,你应该去求取这门学问 (:

或许不是不明白,是装着不明白
装疯卖傻,我的却比不上,
但提醒你一句别装的太逼真,
把自己给逼疯了d:

能者多劳,我做,我学,
虽然心里很不是滋味,
但我相信我的意志力,
我无须依赖你 (:

我真的祝福你,
尽快明白什么叫做责任感 (:

我无须再多说,
这种合作我不稀罕,
这种合作不配称为合作,
这是一种折磨,
珍重 (:

有多少時候,
人不是不懂,
只是不想懂;
不是不知道,
只是不想說;
不是不明白,
而是明白了,
也無能為力;
所以有一些話,
只能藏在心裡,
自己明白就好
- 几米 -