Live long (:

There is really too many things in my mind
after today events
I don know why (:

Mummy never said anything
whenever I got back from anywhere
and got hurt or felt tired (:
But this time she said something really inspired me

CHS is like a society
but a smaller ones (:
Everyone would not get everybodys' support

If someone don't appreciate you
Don border bout them
Is like when you grow up to work in a company
if A did not appreciate you
chg to B and so on (:

She asked me what have I got today?
I said nothing but got sick d;
She asked me why did I do so hard for?
I said I was forced to :/

I never have an interest in anything since I am a kid
I do not have a clear direction to go with
My interest in almost everything will always fade out after some time
And I never really have any succeed & achievement till now
I am way behind gor gor ):

Mummy told me
We don't have to gain any benefits or anything from whatever we do
Although may not achieve success in the end
but it is still worth when we learn something from it

She said that no one will still appreciate me
although i do till cry, do till sick
* I din't know she knew i cry -.- *
even though i don't expect any appreciation
I got nothing to say.

And again she asked me
Is it worth for me to sacrifice for today event?
I think she felt that i was stupid to do that

I felt very stupid too
VERY VERY STUPID
I never think logically
I always take up all the responsibility that people doesn't want to do it
How stupid I am

I am very confused now
I asked her should i quit
seriously should i?

I am not happy to be in there
I feel very stress all the time
I never feel i have got any freedom in it
I did all that just because of i was asked to
How long have I been manipulate like a robot?

There is still one more year to be in high school
People said high school life will be the most precious moment
High school life will make you smile all the time
but mine was not at all
maybe just some of it

I am now at a crossroad
without lights without direction
I need someone to help me out (:

I really have to stop thinking about this
I need to focus
focus on my studies (:

I want those people to know that
I am not born to be manipulated by them
not to be like a slave to them
I am a person who can walk by myself
I want to show them by action
by any means
I wish I can (:

Freedom is mine
My life will be drawn and coloured by myself
maybe their life is like a jail
dull and nothing
I don care d:
Mine will be as colourful as rainbow and bubbles (:

New day , new start , new life (:
Make their specs drop!
I can do it :D
BOO YA!